Kiss Kiss Bang Bang and other Sounds

[neverwouldiever]

The adventures of John Hart and Jack Harkness, sometimes guest-starring the Doctor.





Sexting Meme threads:

Doctor and John
Jack and John
Doctor and Jack

Comments

[recidivates]

I can't say until I look but a lot of the time, the ships have their own ideas how it's done.

This one ship had some very naughty cables that went some interesting places. If you follow my drift.

[neverwouldiever]

Alright, alright, you can back off right there. The only one working on the TARDIS cables and everything else is me.

[recidivates]

Cool your jets, I said I wouldn't. Unless she wants it. Then you're not her dad, she can fuck whoever she wants.

[neverwouldiever]

Blah blah blah.

Just stay out of the Time Vortex.

[recidivates]

Time vortex?

Is that a euphemism or what?

[neverwouldiever]

...John.

What do you think the 'vortex' part of vortex manipulator meant?

[recidivates]

I know what a time vortex is, genius. I just thought you were being creative. You know, vortexes. They're kind of sexy.

[neverwouldiever]

You know what happened to Jack then?

I don't know about sexy.

[recidivates]

What? You mean the immortal thing?

Nah, he never said. Doesn't tell me anything any more. I only know he's immortal cause I killed him.

[neverwouldiever]

So he told me.

He was brought back to life using the time vortex, more or less. Only accidentally it sort of made him a fixed point.

Gives me the creeps a bit.

[recidivates]

Fixed point? Like forever? Well.

I find it a little weird too, personally. Immortality, it's one of those 'careful what you wish for' deals.

[neverwouldiever]

It's Rose's fault. Well. Mine, ultimately.

Or the Daleks'. Let's go with that.

[recidivates]

If there's a problem, you can usually blame the Daleks.

Annoying wheelie bin bastards.

[neverwouldiever]

Yeah. They keep surviving somehow.

Wait. Daleks you know, but not Time Lords?

What is this universe coming to?

[recidivates]

There's clearly more Daleks than Time Lords.

They caused like half the wars in the universe, you'd have to be dumb to miss them.

[neverwouldiever]

Given I'm the last of the Time Lords, unfortunately that's probably true.

They're afraid of me, you know? Tip for you in case you ever face one.

[recidivates]

You expect me to know about your race when you're the last one? Yeah, right, not egotistical at all. Hmm, last of your kind.

I bet you're worth a lot then, aren't you?

[neverwouldiever]

Nah. Just said it yourself, no one knows about me!

Well. I'm of some sentimental value to a friend or two I suppose. They might give you a jellybaby.

[recidivates]

Someone would. The less you know about something niche, the more likely you'll find a weirdo who'll pay you lots of money for it.

What's a jellybaby? Sounds gross.

[neverwouldiever]

Oh no, it's delicious! It's one of Earth's greatest foods. You'll have to try some time. I used to be in the habit of carrying some around all the time.

[recidivates]

Well, come bring me some any time. I'm just here, in a cell, bored. I'd welcome any company. Or food.

Jack forgot about food I think. That's a bitch.

[neverwouldiever]

Sorry, I prefer staying out away from Torchwood as much as I can. I made an exception to drop you off!

You're special.

[recidivates]

So special I don't get to rid in your ship?

Yeah, pretty fucking special.

[neverwouldiever]

Don't take it personally. I don't travel with people anymore.

[recidivates]

I wasn't overly offended, just pointing out the logical flaws. You do what you want to do.