Kiss Kiss Bang Bang and other Sounds

[neverwouldiever]

The adventures of John Hart and Jack Harkness, sometimes guest-starring the Doctor.





Sexting Meme threads:

Doctor and John
Jack and John
Doctor and Jack

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Arriving at Torchwood

[neverwouldiever]

The Doctor glanced at John Hart, apparently the time agent's name. They hadn't had much time to talk after he'd decided he needed a break and to confer with Jack, so he hadn't gotten much information out of him, whether false or true. But he trusted Jack.

Up to a point, at least. He had scrambled with John's vortex manipulator, he had handcuffed him, since Jack said he should be restrained and he had tried to think of better options than dropping the man off with Jack, but came up short. Whatever, he couldn't protect Jack from his own demons. Actually, judging by their history together, there was precious little he ever managed to protect Jack from. Why the man remained loyal to a fault he'd never comprehend. He had failed him, just as he kept failing many during this regeneration.

But there they were. The Doctor picked John up and dragged him to the TARDIS door, glancing at the monitor to check whether Jack was was waiting already before stepping outside.

[chronosexual]

Of course Jack was there. Any mention of the Doctor's name and he'll come running every time with hopes of getting even a glimpse of that wonderful man. However, tonight, he was more somber. A bit more "Captain"-like as he stood at attention with his hands folded behind him. Sure enough, soon came the wheezing and groaning he'd come to associate with the blue box that materialised not far from where he stood near the lift into Torchwood.

He waited for the doors of the TARDIS to open before he made his way to the machine, surprised to see the Doctor actually hefting the unconscious John. A sight he hoped he'd never have to see.

"How is he?" Jack said, hurrying in to relieve the Doctor of the dead weight.

[neverwouldiever]

"Really, really randy." But the Doctor did realize that Jack wasn't actually asking about that, likely because he was more than aware, and so he gave a serious answer once he'd stepped back to leave Jack to carry him. "He'll be right as rain in no time. That gunshot wound should heal quickly and he's just gonna sleep for a while longer. An hour or two, maybe. Well. He's lost quite a bit of blood, so it might be more."

The Doctor rubbed the back of his head considering whether he wanted to actually step outside. Torchwood. No, not so much, not really. On the other hand, Jack, and, well. That'd always be complicated.

"I didn't take all his weapons. Or any." He gestured behind himself vaguely. "Gun's over there."

[chronosexual]

"Not surprised. If you think my 'off' switch is broken, you obviously haven't met John Hart." He sets John down against the TARDIS and steps inside the familiar bridge to fetch John's gun.

"I hope he didn't give you any trouble." Jack set the gun into the waist of his trousers, his own holster already occupied, and turned back around to leave. Once he'd had John over his shoulder, he turned to face the Doctor, a guilty and somewhat saddened look in his eye.

"Thanks. I'll take care of him from here. In the meantime, if you run across any authorities who might be missing him... I wouldn't object to them finding out a vague area he might be."

[neverwouldiever]

"I can do that." Not that he's sure how to feel about that, either. He should probably stop drawing parallels, fast. "All his vortex manipulator can do is contact me, if I'm in the mood, and play a Katy Perry song. I reckon he might not be too happy about that, but you can blame it on me."

He saw the look in Jack's eyes and it did make him regret ever taking John there. He could have dealt with him in other ways, but it had felt right to ask him and here they were.

"Your wrist." The Doctor pulled out the sonic screwdriver and held his hand out. "I can configure your manipulator some too."

Message to the Doctor.

[recidivates]

You devious little prick.

You're not half as funny as you think you are.

[neverwouldiever]

That's what people always say when I don't wake them up before I go go.

[recidivates]

What is it with you and pop songs? I can't believe you stuck one in my manipulator. What good is that? I need to do my job, not listen to music.

You're not worth half the effort I've put in. Couldn't even get decent pictures.

[neverwouldiever]

In some centuries those might be classics, you never know. Well. Maybe you do know. I do.

You kill too much for my taste. Sorry.

Eh, Jack's been trying for years and not gotten very far, don't be too hard on yourself.

Adventure Time!

[neverwouldiever]

The Doctor was sure he had the coordinates just right. That was the thing with Jack, his state of being a constant actually made him stick out like a sore thumb, so to say, wherever he was across time and space. Vexing sometimes, like an itch at the back of his head, yet at the same time reassuring. A mix of emotions, like so many things about Jack.

He materialized right around him this time, not looking away from the console as he moved around it, pushing buttons and pulling levers. Jack was on board, that's what mattered, and so he was already explaining himself. At least it counted as an explanation in his eyes.

"There's something for you to do. Requires a delicate touch and a very special skill-set, namely this non-dying thing you do. The year's ten thousand six hundred seventy-two, there's this factory that turns waste of all kind into oxygen. It's beautiful, really, taking things apart on a subatomic level and... Well, just imagine a giant air purifier, right? Got that?" He paused to reach for his ear, tugging on his earlobe. "Well, it's nothing like that, but you got the gist. Anyway, there are several planets depending on it and it's about to blow up. I'd go in, but the radiation damage would kill me before I could fix anything, so I thought to myself, who do I know that can't die? Jack!"

Finally he bothered to actually look up, offering Jack an admittedly brilliant smile. "Hey!"

Come on, grab your friends

[chronosexual]

Jack's face was bruised and his lip bleeding. Despite Jack's best efforts, he'd let John get under his skin and let their once somewhat jovial, teasing conversation turn nasty and then into a fistfight, which quickly devolved into the two of them locking mouths and tearing at each other's clothes. Pretty standard for an evening with the two of them, honestly.

John had been such a very good distraction for him, which was probably why he failed to notice the sound of the TARDIS materialising around him. His only clue that anything had even changed was the sound of the Doctor flapping his mouth. He wasn't quite sure what to make of it, but it did manage to grab his attention, though somewhat awkward for him with one hand in John's hair and the other in his trousers.

Well.

"You.. what?" Talk about a hard right turn into a wall. "Hold on... slow down and back up."

[recidivates]

Wait, what? Something was wrong and he didn't really feel like placing it because honestly, he was a look too busy trying to kiss him harder. Hell, a nuclear bomb could go off and he'd never notice so long as Jack was there, distracting him with those wonderful lips and that nice taste of post-punched blood. When Jack started to stop, hands still down his trousers, John finally turned his head and--

Fuck.

Cockblocked by the Doctor. Again? Really? Oh for fuck sake.

Maybe he could just continue? With a frown, he made little move to change his position though at least he did stop kissing because hey, he wasn't totally rude, you know? Instead, he gave the Doctor something akin to a cocky grin, sure he was pissed off but it was kind of funny. And hell, he could fuck anywhere if he had too. "Mind giving us some privacy, twiggy? Trying to fuck here, mate."

[neverwouldiever]

The Doctor frowned, then made a face, clearly displeased. "What did you bring him for?" He turned back to the console to kick the old girl into orbit and probably leave it at that for a while, since Jack didn't seem to be as ready to leap into action as he had hoped. He turned his back to them, pretty much pouting. This was not what he asked someone on the TARDIS for. Well, he hadn't technically asked, but still!

"Stop that, will you? There are lives at stake here." Truthfully, he had all but forgotten about John right up until this moment and he'd definitely been the happier for it. 'Twiggy' didn't help matters much. Not a nickname he much cared for, although that was mostly because he could imagine Donna taking to it only too well and he missed her. Missed her especially much when he was flustered, which happened more often than he'd have cared to admit. "Focus, Jack. I need you to focus."

Before their trip, easy texting thread!

[recidivates]

How much do I have to pay you to fix this thing then?

I'll bargain with you. What do you want?

[neverwouldiever]

No price you could afford. No price the world can afford.

[recidivates]

Ambitious. You must be hard to shop for at Christmas.

[neverwouldiever]

Not a big fan of Christmas anyway. Never goes well for me.

An unspecified not too long time after their last adventure, a text from the Doctor to Jack.

[neverwouldiever]

Just out of curiosity... Do you happen to have any medicine adapted to your, 51st century biology? I mean, I know you don't get sick, I was just wondering. No reason. Absolutely no reason.

[chronosexual]

Saying 'no reason' makes me think there's a reason. Why do you ask?

[neverwouldiever]

There isn't a reason! And if there was one I'd not tell you before you tell me.

[chronosexual]

I don't think you would. Of course we had medicine growing up. If you're asking about me specifically, that's more difficult because, as you said, I don't get sick.

Doctor and John take a super fun trip ... to a quarantine

[recidivates]

Well that was fun. The Doctor said he'd take him on a trip, one special trip, and John being the idiot he was agreed because hell, his ship was missing, his wrist strap didn't work and he was hoping the Doctor's idea of a fun trip was somewhere with a bar or a strip joint. Nope, apparently the Doctor liked danger which, okay, sure. That was fun.

But dangerous quarantine that could kill him? Eh, not the good kind of danger. The bad kind. The deadly horrible kind.

It was a wonderful moment when they were finally heading back to the TARDIS. Two hours of standing around a dying planet with people keeling over every five minutes while the Doctor found a cure. Which was impressive, really, if you were into that kind of thing. Personally John would of charged for the cure but oh well, couldn't complain.

They were leaving, that was the important part. "That was a waste of time. I mean really, people enjoy this? Travelling with you. Cause I can't see why. First Daleks, now disease."

[neverwouldiever]

"Oh, it's great fun. Stick with me, John, on a good day I can have us meet Cybermen too." The Doctor entered the TARDIS, heading for the console and getting them started. It had been a good day, for his standards, really. Few had died and he'd triumphed in the end. It made him feel good, better than he had in a while. More optimistic.

Sure, John had been complaining a lot, but he'd helped and he'd even seen him smile when they had finally figured it out, when they had gotten to save people. It was a thrill and the Doctor was sure that even if it differed quite a lot from the thrills John was used to, he was enjoying it anyway. "Not as bad as all that, was it?"

[recidivates]

John only smiled with relief cause he wanted to leave, it hadn't really been a fun experience for him. The Doctor got to save the day while some weird squishy alien thing had had a coughing fit all over him, it was revolting. Black gooey stuff in his face. He'd managed to clean it all off but it wasn't fun, it'd gotten in his eyes and mouth. Gross.

Once John was inside, he lazily hung over the edge of the rails, watching the Doctor with a slightly amused smile before the Doctor was happy. Clearly he loved this whole saving the day thing, gave him some kind of high. John had to admire that.

"So what are we doing now? Are you going to drop me off or what?" John asked, more curious than anything. He sniffed slightly, head turned to the side as he felt a strange twinge in his nose.

[neverwouldiever]

"Hm? Oh, yeah. Yeah, I reckon so." The Doctor spun a wheel and leaned against the console with one arm, considering John as if the answer was in him instead of his to make. In a way that was true though. John had done a good job the last few days, admirably so even. And he was a distraction, almost enough to stop him from thinking about the four knocks just around the corner. "We'll just have to figure out where, won't we?"

Maybe one last trip. How much could one last trip hurt? "Where would you want to go, John Hart?" Full name, because he was in that habit, and then, just because, one addition with a smile. "Captain?"