Kiss Kiss Bang Bang and other Sounds

[neverwouldiever]

The adventures of John Hart and Jack Harkness, sometimes guest-starring the Doctor.





Sexting Meme threads:

Doctor and John
Jack and John
Doctor and Jack

Comments

[neverwouldiever]

So why not take orders from Jack?

[recidivates]

Cause he's not paying me too mostly.

[neverwouldiever]

I don't think he has that much money. Independent government agency and all.

[recidivates]

Then that's his problem, not mine. I can find plenty of people out there in the stars who'll pay me their life's riches just to kill, threaten or steal.

[neverwouldiever]

And what do you do with the money?

Never saw the appeal myself.

[recidivates]

Drink, drugs, rock and roll. The usual suspects.

You wouldn't, you're a boring tosser.

[neverwouldiever]

I wouldn't say that. I just access money when I happen to need some.

Don't usually need that much though. I have the TARDIS, what more could anyone ask for?

[recidivates]

I always have access to money, I break into any ATM anywhere. I can get money if I need money, I just like to have things to do.

Plus some highs are pricey these days.

[neverwouldiever]

But you could find other things to do. Me, I get bored without things to do too. That's why I'm always going places. Times. All over the universe.

[recidivates]

I have things to do. I have money for that reason and when I get bored and want more, I get a new job. I'm rarely bored.

[neverwouldiever]

Jack told me you're in and out of rehab. What rehab?

[recidivates]

erm, lemme think

drink, drugs, sex and ...murder. I think that's them all. Honestly, I'm often very high during the meetings.

[neverwouldiever]

What does one do in murder rehab?!

[recidivates]

Not murder mostly.

They make us do arts and crafts and talk about our anger issues.

[neverwouldiever]

Are you any good at arts and crafts? Because otherwise I could see that backfire.

[recidivates]

I made a really lovely popsicle stick windmill.

Then proceeded to ram it down the instructors throat.

But before that he said it was a masterpiece so there's that.

[neverwouldiever]

Congratulations, I suppose. On the masterpiece.

I was pretty good, but my teachers always criticized me anyway. 'Don't draw lightning bolts on your space craft.' I swear it makes it go faster.

[recidivates]

Thanks, I wanted to keep it but they couldn't remove some of it from the blokes throat in time.

Oh I know, teachers are the worst. I spent half my school time in detention. I once got detention for setting fire to a kid AFTER school. Surely that's not fair!

[neverwouldiever]

Oh yeah, mine weren't very fair either. I skipped quite a lot.

Once trapped a teacher in a time loop for a day.

[recidivates]

I got kicked out of school when attacked my maths teacher with a chair.

But time loop? Gotta give you props, that clever.

[neverwouldiever]

Well, I was mucking about with space-time portals at the time. Not that difficult, really.

That must have been about equivalent to your primary school, I reckon.

[recidivates]

Probably. We had a shit education system but we were still rebuilding after the war so hardly a shocker.

To be honest, we could have had the best and I wouldn't of attended.

[neverwouldiever]

I had more fun not attending than I ever had attending. Never did pass the test to actually qualify for piloting a TARDIS.

[recidivates]

I never passed my driving test. I stole my first ship. Actually I stole every ship. I've never not stolen a ship I've owned. Never needed to pay.

[neverwouldiever]

...I borrowed her.